Cookies for Mommy

A few weeks ago, I came across a copy of Woman's Day with the front cover highlighting gorgeous sugar cookies. I had such great images in my head of cutting out all the shapes with the kids, mixing up different colors of fluffy frosting, and giving big pretty plates of cookies away to neighbors. I just knew my kids would love it and that making sugar cookies would be the perfect thing to do on Valentines Day.

OK. Hello. What planet do I think I live on? Because Planet Motherhood brought me back to reality yesterday as I tried to make this crazy vision happen. Since when did sugar cookies become a 12 step program? First mixing the dough, chilling the dough, rolling it out with it sticking to everything. Having to beg the kids to stop playing so we can spend some "quality kitchen time" together. Ha. And then there's the frosting! Not only do you need at least three different colors, but you need one type of thick frosting for the outline and decoration and then you need a fluid frosting for a technique called "flooding," which is basically filling the cookies in. By the time the frosting was ready, the kids had completely lost interest and were begging to be done.

The process took at least 4 hours, 6 different bowls, 5 cookie sheets, a trillion measuring instrument, spatulas, spreading knives and the like, and just about every ounce of patience I had left after a week of "helping" the kids make Valentines for school classes, dance classes, and neighbors; sending off packages to daddy and long distance relatives; and trying to make breakfast and lunch special by producing heart shaped waffles and muffins. Can we say DISHES??? I'm not kidding.

I should have thrown them all in the garbage at that point, but oh no, I had to finish the project, aching feet and all, by myself, when the kids were in bed. The sad thing is that while the cookies are oh-so-pretty to look at, they don't even taste that good! Because they're just too... well, sugary! I figure something good could possibly come out of my calamity, because in my frustration, I had a good idea: I could print a "Sugar Cookies for Dummies" book and it would be number two on the NY Times Bestseller List. Book number one would be "Why Moms Need To Lower Their Expectations and Focus on What's Important."